Toothsome Wink

(no subject)

It hit me today that I am in my last semester of college (well, that didn't just hit me today), that I have two internships, and that I have so many things to do in order to secure some sort of existence for myself in NY. Exciting and all, but I want to check something substantial off the list.

I'm also really tired of Metro North. I hate constantly being on trains. But the nice thing is I got the special "hidden" seat both there and back today. I had a private picnic and almost got away with out having to give the conductor my ticket.
Toothsome Wink

(no subject)

This last week has been so foggy. On New Year's Eve my dad and I went to pick my brother up and couldn't see more than a few feet ahead of us on the freeway. It felt like we were perpetually approaching the end of the line, how appropriate for the end of the year. Our neighborhood is still surrounded in fog and I like it even though it scares me a bit.

My grandma is in the hospital. She is 97 years old and she has pneumonia. Whenever we visit her, she repeats one word over and over again. "Granddaughter. Granddaughter. Granddaughter. Granddaughter. Do you want to eat do you want to eat do you want to eat do you want to eat?" She hasn't eaten much of anything and she doesn't recognize anyone. It's sad to see her like this.

I am relearning to appreciate San Diego. Places are places, and as far as American cities go, it is not a terrible place. Hearing the familiar laughs of some of my oldest friends helps, too.
Toothsome Wink

Le Tigre for a day when I feel like never waking up again

My mind's on rewind and quicksand.
(what?) I was up all night doing nothing.
(last night? again?)
Do you wanna stay in bed all day? (yeah!)
Do you remember feeling any other way? (no!)
Do you wanna stay in bed all day? (yeah!)
Do you remember feeling any other way? (no!)
I must've been sleeping when you called.
I'm not feeling well at all (cough, cough)
I got this thing that's been going around
Called please pretend that I'm out of town okay?
Do you wanna stay in bed all day...
I'll make some coffee, put on some eyeliner.
I think I'll find that things are fine and they're gonna get much finer!
Do you wanna stay in bed all day...
Hey look I'm really sorry I couldn't make it to your party.
I know it looks like I'm gonna cry.
Got a to-do list behind my eyes so go tell your friends I'm still a feminist.
But I won't be coming to your benefit.
I give up.
I give up......I'll be at home today.
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Toothsome Wink

(no subject)

A lot of work, yes. But the strategy of accepting that you won't get any work done over break and coming back not exactly refreshed but able to power through seems to be working for me.


Ich weiß nicht, was zu kommen ist. Ich weiß nur, dass etwas ändern muss.
Toothsome Wink

Warum Deutschland?...Warum nicht?

Nice weather now.
I'm not sure if I want things to move faster or slower, but one of the two would be nice.
I did not realize it, but perhaps I do have a bit of "senioritis." At least in the sense that my mind is not completely confined to this space and this school.